How to relieve tightness and nervous tension? How to get rid of shyness: twelve steps How to remove stiffness in communication.

Man is a social being. Everyone has a need for friendship and love, but shyness makes it difficult to satisfy it. To figure out how to get rid of shyness, you need to identify the causes of this phenomenon. After that, it will be possible to overcome it and fully communicate with people.

Why are people shy?

Shyness is a character trait that occurs in people in the process of improper upbringing. Indifference on the part of parents, or excessive guardianship deforms the psyche of the child. Shyness can also develop in children whose parents, during their upbringing, constantly drew attention to their tendency to be embarrassed by the company of other people. In the earliest years of development, patterns of behavior are formed, which can only be eliminated by hard training. But life without shyness is worth it.

Constriction can only be overcome through communication. But the more a person is shy, the harder it is for him to do it. It turns out a vicious circle, from which it is difficult to get rid of those who have undergone improper socialization.

Important! In extreme cases, shyness develops into a full-fledged social phobia - the fear of social interactions. With social phobia, only long-term work with a psychotherapist helps, getting rid of shyness in advanced cases is obtained only in a few years.

Sometimes stiffness in behavior arises from the desire to please all people at once. Shyness is instilled unconsciously. A child in the process of education may be taught that modesty is good. Getting rid of shyness is hindered by the lack of awareness of what serves as its source. Shyness in this case is not even perceived negatively. Excessive politeness develops into shyness.

Manifestations of stiffness often occur when communicating with the opposite sex. This comes from insufficient communication experience, as well as from incorrectly passed socialization. Ideally, children at school age learn to interact with the opposite sex and build romantic relationships, they do not experience shyness in the future. But not everyone succeeds.

Girls especially often experience shyness when talking to a guy they like. The feeling of awkwardness when communicating is accompanied by stupid behavior that repels the person you like. The more negative experience, the more shyness a person experiences in the future, and the more difficult it is to get rid of it.

Shyness is almost always accompanied by low self-esteem. To overcome the first, it is necessary to get rid of the second. A misperception of oneself develops in the process of parenting. If a child is unnecessarily scolded and scolded for every little thing, he develops a guilt complex that prevents him from getting rid of shyness. In adulthood, he is unnecessarily immersed in himself, pondering each act on the subject of whether other people will like it. It is impossible to get rid of an underestimated, but it is impossible to become a non-shy person in another way.

How to stop being shy?

In the head of each person there is a certain image, which is understood as a social shell perceived by others. In people with normal self-esteem, this image is perceived rather positively, it is easy for them to get rid of the fear of communication. They understand and accept their shortcomings, but don't be too critical of themselves. People with good self-esteem have an understanding that every person is imperfect in some way and it is impossible to get rid of all the shortcomings, but they do not experience shyness, like people with poor self-esteem.

The first most popular cause of self-doubt, which you need to get rid of, is a critical attitude towards your own appearance. The first impression of a person is made up of his external data. Getting rid of a bad first impression is almost impossible. Unsuccessful experience in dating and communication exacerbates shyness. In the process of communication, it can change, but it is much easier for good-looking people to win over people. Seeing a good attitude towards themselves, they get rid of modesty in advance, become more relaxed.

So take care of yourself:

• Choose new clothes for yourself, find your style that suits you. Don't be too conservative in your dress so that people don't want to keep their distance from you;
• Go in for sports, physical activity has a good effect on mental health, and in gyms you can make new acquaintances, get rid of complexes related to appearance;
• Learn to accept your shortcomings. Some of them cannot be permanently destroyed. Therefore, learn to perceive them as part of yourself in order to get rid of shyness.

Social interactions require certain skills. This is most noticeable when interacting with strangers. It is necessary not only to get rid of bad self-esteem, but also to acquire the skill of communication. When a person communicates with a narrow circle of close people, social barriers are erased. Once you have decided to put an end to shyness, communicate more. You can get rid of shyness in several stages. Don't pay attention to mistakes at first, they are a necessary experience to get rid of social awkwardness.

Try to be an interesting person for interlocutors, look for common ground to get rid of awkwardness. Shyness is blunted in the presence of common interests. If you are afraid to approach a stranger and start a dialogue, use platforms to find random interlocutors on the Internet to get rid of the fear of leaving a bad impression and shyness. You will not feel embarrassed if you enter an anonymous chat where your identity is not known to anyone, and you can get rid of an unpleasant interlocutor with one click.

Exercises for shyness

The first exercise is to get rid of the shyness of being in public places and short interactions with random passers-by. Go to crowded places and ask random people how to get to a certain place. Or ask them similar questions that do not force you to further communication, this will help get rid of the fear of initiative in communication. It will be easier to overcome your fear of communication, because you know that a person will not remember you and will not insist on continuing communication, and it will be easy to get rid of obsessive people.

Improvise alone to get rid of bad communication skills. The ability to dump a verbal stream on the interlocutor is not given to us from birth, as well as shyness. When you're alone at home, try to just say out loud absolutely everything that comes to your mind. You need to get rid of shyness in front of yourself. Spending 15-20 minutes a day on such a workout, be sure that in a few months it will not be difficult for you to choose a topic when communicating with someone. The conscious ability to speak beautifully will deprive you of shyness, because you will be sure that you are interesting to your interlocutors.

Read more books to get rid of shyness. Developed speech attracts interlocutors. Fiction develops the ability to beautifully and concisely express one's thoughts. Try to read books filled with humor to get rid of excessive dryness in communication. Jokes and laughter defuse the atmosphere of communication and help remove shyness.

To get rid of shyness and develop speech, watching other people's public crimes is perfect. Watching people, we involuntarily adopt their manner of communication, this helps to get rid of poor speech. If you watch lectures and speeches by charismatic people who are not shy, some of their charisma will be transferred to you. To get rid of shyness, you need to watch performances of people who themselves make a strong impression on you.

There are many shy people. And they, too, unite in communities. They can be found not only on the Internet, but also in real life. In most cities, these communities organize a training or meeting where you can practice communication skills with people who are similarly suffering from shyness. They are also looking for a way to get rid of shyness, it will be easier to find a common language. Just do not think that attending such events will automatically make you a confident person. Get rid of shyness gradually. You will have to visit many public places before your fears are finally dissipated.

How to get rid of love shyness?

It's one thing to overcome shyness to make friends. The other is to find a soul mate and start a romantic relationship. Many do not have any fear when communicating with people of the same sex, but as soon as it comes to communicating with the opposite sex, shyness and obsession with their own fears begin. For shyness when communicating with the opposite sex, a psychological term has even been coined - love shyness. The most effective way to get rid of it is psychotherapy.

The phenomenon of love shyness has deep roots in the mental development of a person and his genes. However, this does not mean that it is impossible to get rid of shyness in front of the person you like. It is advisable to visit a psychotherapist and perform the exercises given to them. But if you are not the owner of pathological modesty when communicating with the opposite sex, you can get rid of shyness on your own.

In front of a guy or a girl, try to behave as naturally as possible, do not intentionally try to get rid of manifestations of shyness. Do not try to create a certain image to make a person fall in love with him. If you are in a long-term relationship, the image will still be revealed, it is better to get rid of the desire to please at any cost. It is best if the person falls in love with you. As the relationship develops, there will be less and less shyness. A good love relationship helps to get rid of it.

Remember! The rest of the people also have significant shortcomings. Dale Carnegie advised in public speaking to imagine that all the audience you speak to owe you a large amount of money. Initially, putting yourself a little higher than another person, it will be much easier to communicate with him, shyness will disappear from the realization of your own superiority. It also helps to overcome awkwardness at first, accompanied by inappropriate words and gestures.

There is a stereotype that a girl should be modest. From early childhood, girls are instilled with a sense of shame for themselves when communicating with boys. In adulthood, it is very difficult for them to cope with shyness. Girls should remember that guys also experience when communicating with the person they like. Every guy worries about his appearance and manners when he starts a dialogue with a beautiful girl. Keep this in mind and it will be easier for you to deal with shyness.

Conclusion

The feeling of tightness during communication arises from low self-esteem. A person who has difficulty communicating makes excessive demands on himself. The one who learns to accept himself along with his shortcomings, and also will not put himself below other people, will get rid of constraint. To achieve this, you need to spend a lot of time on the practice, in which you will move from short conversations to building friendships and love relationships.

Many of us condemn liberated, self-confident people, although in fact we want to be like them. This is not surprising, since such individuals strive to become the soul of the company, they energize and leave a piece of themselves after leaving. On the other hand, non-shy people seem self-confident and arrogant. One way or another, in order to overcome shyness, you need to study all aspects and draw up a competent plan. Let's talk about everything in order.

Reasons for shyness

1. People become shy when they spend a lot of time alone. The inability to communicate socially is caused by a lack of basic communication skills.
2. The genetic factor also contributed. If a child grows up in a family with shy parents, this feature will be transferred automatically.
3. Insecure people are often shy. This is due to constant criticism from others or low self-esteem imposed by the subconscious.
4. Fear of communication with others and, as a result, isolation, arise due to the experienced psychological trauma. A person tries to protect himself from future losses, so he becomes shy.
5. If a child lives in a family that regularly criticizes and humiliates him, the child will automatically grow up withdrawn. The same applies to children living in permanent bans.
6. There are people who are afraid to "fall into the mud face." This is due to public censure, a person does not want to be rejected by colleagues, friends, relatives and even unfamiliar people.
7. Stereotypes influence the formation of life principles. If a child has been constantly praised and had high expectations, he will try to do everything not to destroy the illusion. Such a person is afraid to express his thoughts in the future.

How to get rid of shyness

It should be remembered that isolation is not a vice. Young girls are much more attractive when a blush appears on their cheeks, and their voice trembles slightly. However, if such a feature prevents you from fully existing, you need to get rid of it.

Method number 1. Chat with strangers

1. In most cases, people become shy well in advance of interacting with strangers. Such behavior is erroneous, because you cannot baptize children with these people.
2. Accept invitations from friends to visit various parties, concerts, cinemas. Get in the habit of meeting at least 2 new people a month.
3. At first, you can smooth things over by making friends through social media. Start with VKontakte or Odnoklassniki, then make an appointment yourself when you're ready.
4. Get out more often. Visit crowded cafes and restaurants, crowded places. Stand in line, pay utility bills, communicate.
5. Engage in self-solving pressing issues. This applies more to visiting authorities and other serious offices (passport office, housing and communal services, tax, etc.).

Method number 2. Find new buddies

1. Visit social groups or register on forums where people share their doubts. Find someone with the same problem. Discuss with him the topic: "How to overcome shyness."
2. It is also recommended to find a person by the method of "on the contrary". It is important that a new acquaintance does not have complexes and shyness. This personality will constantly pull you out of your comfort zone. This will help loosen up.
3. Each person comes into your life for a reason. Choose a circle of communication in such a way that people of all social groups are present in it. Of course, you should not go into crime.
4. Whenever possible, communicate only with successful people. Create an idol for yourself, follow his path. Do not be afraid of your own mistakes, they are required for experience.

Method number 3. Do bold things

1. Analyze your life. Highlight the actions that you could not decide on for a long time. Have you been planning to jump with a rope or a parachute for a long time? Dare!
2. Regardless of whether you are a man or a woman, take a closer look at motor vehicles. People on two-wheeled iron horses look bold and confident. Unlearn category "A", buy a sports bike and equipment.
3. Acts that can overcome shyness include participation in television programs (in particular extras), beauty contests and other public appearances. Presenting your thoughts to the public will liberate you, most importantly, prepare carefully.
4. If you're a girl, wear an extravagant petite top or high heels. Reconsider your image, recolor your hair in a bright shade. Visit a fetish hangout, attend a charity event or become a volunteer.
5. People who experience long-term sympathy for the opposite sex should invite a person on a date. Take courage and dare, live for today.
6. In all of these actions, it is important to know the measure. Do not jump right off the bat, think about your own safety and morale. Do not run into trouble, carefully plan and predict all actions.

Method number 4. Gain confidence

1. In most cases, people become shy because of complexes that appear over the years or stem from childhood. To get rid of shyness, it is necessary to eliminate uncertainty in all possible ways.
2. If you don't feel comfortable because the weight class is over the top, go for it. Sign up for a gym, get rid of cellulite, go on a diet. Buy clothes that hide imperfections.
3. Revisit your image. Get a new haircut, change your hair color, go for a manicure and pedicure. Attend makeup courses, find "your" cosmetics, don't go out without makeup.
4. Get rid of the "junk". It includes old clothes with spools and outstretched knees, shabby shoes and bags, old jackets. Replace every discarded item with a new, more stylish and unusual one.
5. Evaluate your capabilities with regards to your current profession, develop in your career, increase your earnings. Try to communicate with people who have already achieved heights. Learn their secrets of success, share your own experience.
6. Love pushes for more, find a gentleman or life partner. Pretend for the sake of your loved one, make each other happy. A stable personal life adds confidence.

Method number 5. Describe yourself

1. Prepare a notebook, write down your positive aspects in it. Be sure to specify not only about mental and physical abilities, but also external data.
2. For example, you can write that you are positive, courageous, successful. It is desirable to clarify the ability to achieve goals and objectives, responsive nature, kindness.
3. If you are having difficulty with your characterization, contact your relatives or friends. Make a psychological portrait together.
4. You need to list as many positive qualities as possible. Number them for clarity. Hang the list on the refrigerator or bathroom mirror. Re-read every morning and believe in what you have written.
5. It is important to remember forever that a person is made up of his own thoughts and beliefs. Think positively about yourself, never doubt your own abilities.

Method number 6. Develop materially and spiritually

1. In the near future, you need to communicate more with versatile people. This method will increase your communication skills and relieve you of shyness.
2. To become an interesting conversationalist, develop spiritually. Read books, attend seminars on personal growth. Examine the circle of communication, remove those who pull you down.
3. Money plays a big role in the modern world. People who say otherwise are deeply mistaken. With the help of finances, you can secure a decent life, travel, and be confident in the future.
4. Isn't that what eradicates shyness?! Look for a more profitable profession or ways of additional income. Never stop. Get in the habit of raising your salary by at least 10% per month. At the same time, learn to procrastinate.
5. If you still don't know who you want to be, it's time to fix the situation. Analyze what you are drawn to the most. Perhaps to mathematics, art or other creativity? Do you like to work with your hands or your head? Based on this, shape yourself.

Method number 7. go in for sports

1. A decent physical shape raises self-esteem and morale. Gyms are visited by many people, so contact with them is often indispensable. Feel free to ask how to use certain simulators. Look for new acquaintances.
2. Agree with friends that you will throw off 5 kg. and pump up the buttocks, abs, arms. Limit yourself to specific limits. Start running, jump rope, squat.
3. It is not necessary to spend fabulous money on a subscription. Enjoy summer and winter sports without overpaying your hard-earned funds.
4. If you still decide to visit specific sections, consider Pilates, water aerobics, stretching, yoga, dancing of all directions, kickboxing, cross-fit.
5. In clubs you will be taught to behave liberated. The coach will tell you how to get rid of shyness and will do everything to ensure that you achieve your goals. Especially shy people should turn to a professional instructor in a particular sport.

Method number 8. Please your loved ones

1. Learn to give joy to relatives and close friends. In return, they will show gratitude to you, make compliments. In this simple way, you will gain confidence and stop doubting yourself.
2. Stop conflicts, do not harbor anger and resentment. They will eat you from the inside. Communicate with people politely, give tenderness and love to those who deserve it.
3. For your own peace of mind, start a calendar. Indicate in it significant dates, birthdays of your friends and relatives. It is important to understand that without social communication a person fades.

Identify the causes of shyness, eradicate them in a short time. Constantly work on yourself, do not stop there. Find passive income, climb the career ladder. Review your wardrobe and your image in general. Go in for sports, look for new circles of acquaintances, travel. Take the initiative in communicating with friends, improve your personal life, please loved ones.

Video: how to stop being shy

Nervous tension, or as it is often called emotional tightness (stiffness), is one of the causes of human problems.

Many people are unable to get rid of this disease. They simply do not know how to relax their mind, body, relieve fatigue. Often this kind of tightness leads to stressful situations and nervous breakdowns, which negatively affects the state of the body as a whole.

Tightness in emotions leads to the following negative phenomena:

An increase in the load on the body and internal sensations of a person, which contributes to the appearance of fatigue and the possibility of diseases;

Disturbed process of uniform distribution of energy, its excessive waste;

Disturbances in the circulatory system;

Permanent deterioration of the human psyche;

Broken nervous system.

In order to learn how to relieve nervous tension on your own and without much effort, it is recommended to pay careful attention to some stages:

1. Identification of the causes of this discomfort.
2. Improving the process of getting rid of emotional tightness to a mechanized one, that is, learning to eradicate the problem even at a subconscious level.

Types of emotional tightness (stiffness):

Emotional tightness (stiffness) is divided into two main types:

1. Active. The main feature of this variety is its presence in real time. In other words, this is a tightness that occurs with a person directly during the onset of a problem. Its action is noted at a time when a person experiences feelings such as anger, anger, fear.
2. Constant. In another way, such stiffness is also called background. This is due to its action, which manifests itself in a kind of background mode, when it seems to a person that he is completely calm. These are problems that seem familiar and do not cause any unnecessary worries. Such tension can be seen by discomfort in the lumbar region.

It should be noted that it is necessary to relieve nervous tension both active and constant.

The main causes of emotional tightness (stiffness):

1. Subconscious fears. It is necessary to learn how to get rid of fear, as well as to replace the cause of its occurrence with a state of peace and fearlessness.
2. The presence of negative emotions, as well as attempts to eliminate them, all this leads to constant tension and tightness of the body. Feelings that contribute to the emergence of these processes include pride, resentment, anger and anger.
3. Psychological limitations and desires that were not realized. They arise in the mind of a person and are expressed in a kind of prohibitions, which the latter invented himself. For example, "I have no right to ...", "I will never do ..." and so on. In other words, a person has a desire to do something, but cannot because of fictitious prohibitions that were formed in his head on his own or even in childhood by his parents.

Every auspicious spiritual aspiration must be realized. Otherwise, nervous tension appears, entailing negative consequences. A desire that has not been fulfilled makes the soul suffer, blocking all kinds of human joys and a sense of happiness.

In order to get rid of all invented prohibitions, it is necessary to remove them from your subconscious. This is best done in writing. It is necessary to give arguments that give the right to cancel all restrictions.

1. Emotional background tightness, manifested in the form of a habit. Most often, people, in order to get rid of any one habit, have to acquire another, new, but positive one. In case of stiffness, a favorable option would be a state of calm and balance.

It should be mentioned that relaxation is achieved by minimizing the state of activity and alertness. For example, a person involved in sports will achieve peace only during the rest from physical activities.

1. Causes of tightness caused by an insufficient level of human karma. In this case, nervous tension acts as a kind of punishment. The Spiritual Healer will help to get rid of the disease caused by this cause.

How to relieve nervous tension? What do I need to do:

1. To relieve stiffness (stiffness), first of all, it is necessary to find and eliminate its cause.
2. Achieve the proper level of self-hypnosis.
3. Application of meditation methods. To do this, you first need to learn this technique. It is noted that such training contributes to the rapid formation of skills that will help make the process of stress relief the most effective.
4. Exercises aimed at getting rid of emotional tightness (stiffness). It is recommended to learn how to remove tightness from your thoughts, as well as direct energy to the desired part of the body. Detailed information about this point can be found in the books of D. Milman "The Journey of Socrates" and "The Way of the Peaceful Warrior".
5. Personal contact with a Spiritual Healer is considered the most effective way to relieve emotional stress. It will help to find the exact cause that causes discomfort and develop an effective set of ways to eliminate it.

In addition to the above methods of getting rid of stiffness, there are methods related to traditional ones:

Physical exercise:

Various types of running and martial arts;

Classes in the gym;

Swimming;

Fitness programs and yoga;

Special breathing exercises;

Dance moves.

It should be noted that in order to relieve nervous tension of a particularly strong level, it is necessary to perform physical exercises with the most intense load, so that after their implementation there is no strength left at all. People involved in sports will definitely understand what is at stake.

Relaxing treatments:

Visiting baths, saunas;

The use of a contrast shower;

Music therapy;

Making love with a loved one.

It must be remembered that these methods will help get rid of emotional tightness (stiffness) only for a short period of time. They do not remove the internal causes of the problem. In order to eradicate the disease forever, you need to constantly work on it. To resort to such measures as the adoption of alcoholic beverages is not recommended at all.

Source

Sociability and spontaneity are important qualities on which a career may depend. What if they are not your trump card? How to get rid of stiffness and tightness? There are several psychological techniques that will help you in this matter.

How to get rid of tightness?

Why does stiffness appear

This problem, like most complexes, reaches out to a person from childhood. The most common causes of stiffness and shyness are:

• frequent criticism of adults, especially parents;
• rejection and ridicule of peers;
• creation of "closed" situations (isolation from the outside world, friends);
• low self-esteem;
• bad performance experience.

All these factors, falling on the fertile ground of an unformed personality, often leave an imprint for life.

How to get rid of tightness

There are several ways to overcome your shyness. It's worth trying all of them and then sticking with the ones that suit and appeal to you the most.

• Love yourself. To do this, just take a piece of paper, a pencil and write a list of your virtues. Don't be shy, each person has a lot of them. Write and speak out loud. So you learn not to be afraid of the loud sound of your voice. Your task is to believe that you really are the most unique and beautiful person on the globe. This is true.
• Write yourself a speech or simply prepare a poem, a piece of prose, to be read aloud and aloud. Recite in front of a mirror, work out intonations, gestures, facial expressions.
• Do the same exercise, but turn on loud music in the background, preferably rock. Practice until you realize that loud sounds do not bother you at all.
• Repeat everything, but in front of a small audience. Let it be close friends, relatives. Ask them for their comments. Calmly listen to criticism and make changes that you agree with. If you have any doubts, feel free to express them to your opponents. This is a great way to get rid of tightness and anxiety.
• Get out into the world more often. Attend exhibitions, places of large congestion of people. Learn to smile and be positive. Strive for communication. Ask the seller in the store about the product, ask the ticket collector at the cinema his opinion about the film.
• Ignore the excitement. Everyone is worried, this is a normal feeling.

Repeat these practices constantly and daily. After a short period of time, you, without expecting it yourself, will become more relaxed and free.

The question of how to stop being shy, withdrawn and insecure worries a huge number of people who want to overcome their inner fear.

Since the listed character traits are rarely found one by one, but flow from each other (a shy person is usually withdrawn and unsure of himself), in order to suppress them, you will have to do serious step-by-step work on yourself.

Shyness in any form prevents you from being yourself.
A person fully reveals himself only when he feels at ease.
Stefan Zweig. Impatience of the heart

Introduction

The phrase “modesty adorns” has long been set on edge. Yes, in some situations modesty is needed, because excessive boasting or obvious narcissism does not suit a worthy person. But shyness is something else.

This quality prevents both the most modest person from living and puts his environment into a stupor - they try to help him, understand, reveal, but this does not always work out. As a result, a shy person drops out of public life, as it is boring with him and there is nothing to talk about. And this gives rise to new complexes and negative emotions in a closed person. And something needs to be done about it.

If you take some actions, make your efforts and back up with a great desire, then everything will definitely work out!

Finding out the cause is the first step on the road to success

The ancient sages said: "Find the cause of the problem - and this is already half of its solution." A person becomes withdrawn, shy or insecure due to certain experiences, psychological traumas or events that have occurred in his life.

Based on negative experience, he does not see an alternative to a favorable development of events and does not try to change the habitual pattern of behavior. All this leads to even greater problems, including hermitage, passivity, escape from reality into the world of fantasies, illusions, virtual games.

The most common causes of shyness, isolation or insecurity in the company of strangers are:

• fear;
• resentment;
• stress;
• psychological trauma.

Fear

For example, fear invariably breeds distrust of everything unfamiliar. Instinctively, a person withdraws into himself, believing that in this way he will avoid problems, awkward situations, and possible ridicule.

Often, with a closer acquaintance, a person reveals himself in a company from a completely different perspective, but at the initial stage, fear makes him be extremely careful in his statements and actions.

Resentment at the world around for the failures that have occurred also becomes the cause of shyness, isolation, and uncertainty. A person fences himself off from reality, not allowing himself to share his own experiences, emotions, or positive impressions with others.

Unfortunately, over time, resentment only accumulates, and if it does not find a natural outlet, then the person becomes aggressive, and sometimes even dangerous to society. Therefore, before you stop being shy and insecure, you should definitely get rid of the mentioned feeling.

Stress, psychological trauma

The stress experienced or the psychological trauma experienced earlier forces the individual to close his inner world from strangers. According to statistics, more than 40% of respondents experience depression and are dissatisfied with their own lives, they do not make contact with unfamiliar people.

Usually, the invisible subsides with overcoming stress, restoring vitality, and the arrival of positive emotions. With regard to psychological trauma, everything is much more complicated here, especially when they were inflicted during the formation of the personality (that is, in childhood). Sometimes, to overcome their consequences, the help of a qualified specialist is required.

How to stop being shy: a guide to action

1. Faith in success

The most difficult thing is to take the first step towards a more liberated self. It may even seem to you that this is unrealistic, that nothing will come of this whole undertaking. Drive away these thoughts! This is not true. You will definitely succeed. Believing in yourself and your success is very important, so stock up on them to the fullest.

2. You are no worse than others

The next stage is the understanding that you are no worse than other people. You are the same, and in some qualities you are superior to many. Remember all your virtues and skills. Some of them are not a sin to brag about or at least demonstrate to the world.

For example, do you write poetry? Stop hiding them! Join a literary community, show your creations to other people. Let not everyone like your poems, but you will definitely find fans of your work.

Remember, in order to receive compliments and approval, you need to show people what you can be praised for. If you are closed, then you simply will not be noticed. And learn to love yourself the way you are. Nobody is perfect.

3. Failure is a learning experience

Criticism or life failures are not always bad. Take your failures not as the end of the world, but as a certain experience that makes you wiser and stronger.

Remember the famous phrase “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”?

Let it be hackneyed, but very truthful. It really is! Therefore, you can be a little sad, even cry, and the next day you pull yourself together and move on to a better life.

4. Face your fears

To overcome your indecision, you need to work hard on yourself. You must be embarrassed to speak in public. Start at least with the pronunciation of toasts. This is a test for many people: to find certain words, put them together in beautiful sentences and pronounce them publicly, even in a small company of close people. It is better to prepare this short speech in advance, think over all the wishes and repeat several times. You will understand that everything is not so scary. Everyone will definitely like it. Try it!

You can also turn to strangers on the street more often with different questions. For example, asking how to get to such and such a street. This will also liberate you, you will be less afraid of communication.

5. Become a pleasant conversationalist

Do you think that in order to carry on a conversation, you need to have some kind of secret knowledge or have a special relationship with a person? This is far from always the case. Many sociable people talk to others about real trifles. So it would not hurt you to adopt this quality, even if it seems stupid at first.

Start by talking about the weather, no matter how trite it may be. Then you can discuss the cases that connect you with the interlocutor. If this is a co-worker, you can talk about the problem of parking near the office building. If a neighbor - about how the bills for rent have risen. The main thing is to start, and the conversation itself can develop, especially if your interlocutor is more sociable than you. Practice! And you will get involved.

6. Compliment

People love to hear nice words addressed to them, even if they are said in passing. And especially women! Give them compliments. It is not necessary to scatter in praise. Suffice it to say that the young lady today has a successful styling or a beautiful dress. You will see how she will immediately become more disposed towards you.

7. The right attitude

Train yourself every day to tune in to the good. A positive mood, albeit from scratch, will help you overcome life's obstacles. Healthy optimism never hurt anyone!

Additional ways to get rid of shyness

Before you stop being shy in companies or when meeting new people, you need to understand that solving this problem depends entirely on the person himself. In order to become more open, liberated, sociable, it will take some time. For some, a few weeks are enough on the path to success, while for others it will take several years before all manifestations of the described negative qualities are finally eradicated.

Now there are several effective ways to stop being shy and withdrawn, insecure.
This list includes:

• personal training;
• development of communication skills;
• performing special exercises ("go ahead").

The method of personal training has now gained immense popularity, as it allows you to inspire a person that he is no worse and no better than other unfamiliar people.

Usually, the delivery of specific attitudes takes place in the form of a “teacher-student”, when an experienced mentor (psychologist) convinces closed and insecure people that no one in the company seeks to ridicule, offend, or humiliate them.

Many of them also experience a certain amount of excitement, but in no way show their own negative feelings. Regular sessions with a specialist who knows how to convince contribute to the achievement of results, and a person overcomes the fear of communication.

Sometimes it is recommended to develop communication skills by doing certain exercises. One of the most useful options for how to stop being shy in a company is to simulate the situation in front of a mirror. It will not be superfluous to prepare a few universal jokes that allow you to defuse a tense situation or give confidence in your abilities. The more a person “rehearses” alone with himself, the more confident and at ease he will feel in a real situation.

An innovative technique was the performance of tasks that require considerable courage from an indecisive shy person. For example, he should come up and talk on the street with complete strangers, ask for a phone number from an attractive girl (guy), talk about some event in a public place. Already after 2-3 such exercises, progress is noticeable, as a person overcomes fear, becomes more open to the world around him, gains self-confidence.

A few important tips for success

Psychologists identify several key aspects of how to stop being shy in the company and at the same time achieve the location of strangers.

The list of such conditions always includes:

• acceptance of constraint (excitement, isolation) as a due fact;
• positive thinking, smile, neat appearance;
• lack of comparison of oneself with other people;
• training slow intelligible speech.

It is necessary to clearly realize that it is quite normal to be shy, to experience excitement or a feeling of isolation in certain situations. Do not try to hide your emotions, because it always looks unnatural and repulsive. At the same time, the appearance, facial expression, and intonation of the voice are of key importance for the initial impression of a person, so try to always look like a needle, exude positive, and don’t forget to smile.

You do not need to constantly draw a parallel with more successful people in the company, otherwise this can lead to negativity, detachment, a desire to quickly go to a quiet secluded place. A huge problem for many people is slurred fast speech, which not all participants in the conversation can make out. Learn to express your own thoughts clearly, clearly, slowly, which will attract the attention of others, avoiding sharp ridicule.

Outcome

Shyness can be overcome - add some effort to your desire and soon you will see a positive result! Be active, decisive and open to people.

Overcoming shyness, shyness, self-doubt is possible only with the help of painstaking work on yourself, positive thinking, getting rid of fears or complexes. Fight your weaknesses, prejudices, negativity - and you will definitely become a successful attractive person!